


What Do You Want?

by JayceCarter



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Femslash, Not Canon Compliant, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rare Pairings, Slavery, Smut, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-16 05:58:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13630083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayceCarter/pseuds/JayceCarter
Summary: A new raider walks into Nuka World, and Mackenzie has no idea how much she'll change her life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Femslash February! I won't be doing a whole month or anything, but wanted to at least have a few things up for it :)

The first time they met, Kenz had nearly fallen into the raider. She didn’t bother with names, not anymore. She was just ‘slave’ if she was lucky most days. Sometimes ‘hey you,’ or ‘whore’ if people were angry.

 

Of course, when they were bleeding out and only Kenz stood between them and death, then she became Doctor. ‘Save me, Doctor. Do something, Doctor!’ She’d heard it all.

 

So, some petty part of her refused to learn names. If they didn’t know hers, she didn’t care to know theirs.

 

A few she couldn’t help. Mason, Nisha, Mags, William, Gage. Those were the big ones. Forget their names and she’d earn a black eye.

 

And Colter.

 

That was the name she’d never forget.

 

But this new raider? This woman with her short black hair, spiked up like she didn’t care, eyes a little too big for her face, or maybe it was just the glasses that made them seem that way?

 

Nora.

 

That was a name she couldn’t forget, and no amount of pettiness could drag it from her head.

 

She ran around the corner, rushing toward the shower to wash Colter off her, and ran right into the woman.

 

“Easy there,” the woman said, grasping Kenz’s arms to steady her. “You’re lucky I’m not as big of some of these folks because running around like that and you’ll end up on your ass.”

 

Kenz wanted to yank away. The last thing she wanted was someone touching her, some stranger thinking they could do whatever they wanted to her. She couldn’t say it, though.

 

As if the woman read it on her face, she took her hands off and lifted them. “My name’s Nora. I’m new here, joined the Pack.” She gazed down at herself and chuckled. “Not like you probably couldn’t tell with this get-up, huh? What’s your name?”

 

Kenz squared her shoulders. “Mackenzie. I’m the doctor here.”

 

“Mackenzie, right. I heard about you, you run the clinic in the market. Good to know where to go if I get hurt.”

 

Kenz wanted to go. She wanted to get back to her own place, to strip off her clothing and scrub down in the shower. She just wanted the conversation to be over.

 

Nora nodded the direction Kenz had been running. “Go on. It’s fine.”

 

Kenz bolted from the strange woman.

 

#

 

A week later, Kenz sat in her clinic. Despite the fact raiders didn’t live an easy life, she rarely had much work.

 

Disagreements tended to leave corpses, and even those rarely turned up. No bodies meant no one went looking for payback, meant no questions. It was the only place the raiders cleaned up after themselves.

 

The sun had set hours before and Kenz was killing time. Colter knew where she was if he wanted her. Kenz only went a few places, and she was sure Colter could find her at any of them. Still, he never bothered her when she worked.

 

It was some strange line he never crossed, never got in the way of her work. Maybe it was his attempt to hold to their deal? Kenz’s farm and her family in exchange for her freedom, for her work as a doctor.

 

“Burning the candle at both ends?”

 

Kenz lifted her face to find Nora in front of her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there.”

 

“Lost in thought?” Nora set her elbow on the counter. She had the easy smile of someone not worried. A strange thing for new raiders.

 

Usually, the new recruits came in with false arrogance. They swaggered around and made a splash, but their eyes told the truth. They were terrified.

 

Nora wasn’t afraid of a damned thing.

 

Where exactly had she come from?

 

“Slow night.”

 

“And what is it you think about on these slow nights?”

 

Kenz set her elbows on the counter, leaning toward Nora. “Are you injured?”

 

Nora didn’t answer the question. “I’ve always liked the night. I guess it’s because when I was younger, I wasn’t allowed to go out at night alone. It was too dangerous for women, you know. Now? Now I like it. I like to crawl up to the top of the wall, on the south side, and just watch over everything at night, just think.”

 

“And what is it you think about?” Kenz threw the question back at Nora.

 

“About the choices I’ve made, the ones I’m sorry about, the ones I’m not, the ones I’m still going to fuck up. I think about where I am, and how I got here, and where I’m going.” She spoke softly, voice low and close and so much more honest than Kenz would have expected. “Is that what keeps you up? Regret?”

 

Kenz shook her head. “Not regret, no. More like what ifs.” What if she never suggested her family move to that farm? What if she’d let Colter die that day, if she’d taken her chances? What if she’d never become a doctor? So many what if’s that could have changed everything.

 

She didn’t regret her deal with Colter. That deal kept her family alive. To regret that would be to spit in their faces.

 

Nora leaned in further, so close that Kenz would swear she could taste the Nuka Cola on the woman’s breath. “What ifs will kill you, sweetheart. The trick, I guess, is to not let anything pass you by. It’s become my motto, to never let a good choice pass me by.” She crossed the last few inches and brushed her lips against Kenz’s. “Or a bad choice.”

 

Kenz returned the kiss, hesitant. Nora’s lips were soft, coaxing, giving. They slid against Kenz, not taking too much, not going too fast. It was an offer, one Nora was telling her she could refuse.

 

The counter kept them apart, gave her space.

 

It worked until Nora’s came to rest on her shoulder, then slid down the front of her shirt, not groping but close enough that it stole away the moment.

 

Kenz yanked back, knocking items from the counter as she did so.

 

She should pick them up, right the items.

 

She couldn’t.

 

“I’m sorry,” Nora said, pulling back. “I didn’t mean to-“

 

Kenz couldn’t hear another word of it. She left the spilled items and fled.

 

#

 

Colter drank his beer, his legs up on the table as he sat in the dining room chair. “You like the outfit I left for you at your place?”

 

Kenz nodded, her hands on his chest as she straddled his waist. “Yes. Thank you.”

 

He lifted a hand and she flinched. It didn’t strike her, though. No, it was worse. He set it against her cheek, thumb rubbing against the skin. “You ever think about my offer?”

 

“What offer?”

 

“For you to move on in here. Better than that piece of shit place you got. No one will fuck with you here, no one will touch you. Hell, you been such a good girl, could even talk about taking this collar off. Could make an honest woman out of you.”

 

Honest woman? It was how he really saw it, wasn’t it? She was his girlfriend. The one he’d slapped a slave collar on, the one that he knew didn’t want him, and he really thought she’d just want to marry him?

 

“I can’t,” she said, again, the same thing she always said when he asked.

 

“You won’t. Not the same thing.”

 

“Why won’t you just force me? You could say we’re married and no one would say a word against it.”

 

“I could, yeah, but that’s not what I want. I want you to want me, to need me.” He pulled her forward until his lips brushed hers. It was hard, aggressive, tinged with beer.

 

Nothing like the kiss that kept her up at night, the soft one from Nora.

 

His fingers dug into the skin below her collar, a reminder of her place, of her lack of power. She’d been there with him all day, some stupid joke of a relationship. And now? Now, with all his skin against her, both naked, she wanted nothing more than to run.

 

He’d never let her run, though. She was there until one of them died.

 

#

 

“So, you found me?” Nora didn’t turn or acknowledge Kenz, didn’t get up and crowd her. She stayed put on the wall where she’d told Kenz she liked to sit at night.

 

“Do you want me to go?”

 

“Only if you want to go.”

 

Somehow, that helped. Putting it on Kenz’s shoulders, letting her decide. What did she want?

 

She sat beside Nora, close enough their knees touched despite both looking out over the wall. Not inside Nuka World. No, Kenz had seen more than enough of that place. They stared out at the open desert.

 

“I’m sorry about kissing you. Well, not so much about doing it, but about upsetting you.”

 

“It’s fine.”

 

“No, it really isn’t. I won’t do it again, you know. You don’t have to worry. I’m not someone to force myself on anyone who isn’t interested and that flinching? That was a whole lot of not interested.”

 

Kenz swallowed hard at the gentle tone of Nora’s voice.

 

It reminded her of her last girlfriend, back before Colter, before Nuka World. Samantha, her name had been. Blonde, thin, blue eyes. She’d kiss Kenz, twisted together in the shack outside of her farm, their own little love nest.

 

She’d missed that. The connection, the kindness. She’d had nothing but Colter in the year since she’d gotten to Nuka World. Not that she’d want another raider, but another hadn’t looked at her. She was owned and they all knew it. No one would dare risk pissing Colter off by touching her, by offering her friendship.

 

“I liked it.” She continued when Nora didn’t respond. “The kiss. I liked it, I did.”

 

“At first, you did. Then something happened up inside your head and it all went wrong.”

 

“That’s not your fault.”

 

“Fault doesn’t really matter. First time I kissed someone after my husband died, I broke down in tears. Hell, poor guy, I cried into his mouth. Sort of ruined the mood. Didn’t matter that I wanted to kiss him, I was just too in my head. I don’t know what it is that has you, Mackenzie, what it is that had you all torn up. I won’t pretend to know, and I know you won’t tell me. You don’t know me, so why would you? I just, I guess I wanted you to know I get it.” Nora set her hand out, palm up, an offer.

 

“Kenz.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I don’t like Mackenzie. Everyone here calls me that, but I go by Kenz.” Kenz set her hand into Nora’s, intertwining their fingers.

 

Nora didn’t turn her head, only closed her hand around Kenz’s in a comforting grasp. “Nice to meet you, Kenz.”


	2. Chapter 2

Kenz didn’t see much of Nora after that, at least not alone. Nora would wander into the clinic with a smile and a joke. She’d buy stimpacks, but that was it.

 

Still, she’d see Nora around the park.

 

The woman kept under the radar. She didn’t get into fights, didn’t swing her ego around. She didn’t make a splash at all. Still, Kenz caught things she didn’t think Nora wanted anyone to see.

 

So when Nora came in, her arm over the shoulder of an Operator, Kenz knew there was trouble.

 

The trouble had been a knife to her stomach. A Disciple blade, if Kenz was any good with weapon wounds, and she was very good with weapon wounds.

 

The man helped settle her on the gurney, his sunglasses looking absurd in the dark market.

 

It took time, but after an hour she had Nora sewed back up and put together. The man never left, watching over Nora, tense but silent.

 

“She’ll live?”

 

Kenz washed the blood from her hands. “Yeah, she’ll live. I am curious why an Operator would be hauling a Pack raider in here, though.”

 

“You probably shouldn’t be curious. You’ll live longer if you’re not.”

 

“She’s my patient, which means I need to know or I’ll call Mason-“ She turned, voice trailing off as she found herself alone, the man in the sunglasses having vanished.  

 

#

 

_Kenz moaned softly as lips wrapped around her nipple. The sting of teeth had her back arching up, her hands sliding into their hair to hold them close._

 

_Her leg wrapped around their hip as she ground down against a thigh. She was desperate and hungry and out of her mind with a need to feel._

 

_They pulled their lips from her nipple and turned their face up to hers._

 

_Nora. Of course, it was Nora. It always was, wasn’t it? Kenz whimpered Nora’s name when Nora drug the flat of her tongue against the still damp nipple, then blew cold air over it._

 

Fingers stroked through her hair, the action dragging Kenz from her dream. She sat up, rubbing her arm across her eyes, looking for who had touched her.

 

Nora, not the dream one who had been naked and warm, but the very real and still injured one on the bed in front of her. “What were you dreaming about?”

 

Kenz didn’t answer, standing on unsteady legs. “How are you feeling? Do you need anything for pain?”

 

Nora pushed herself to sitting, not even a wince crossing her features. “You said my name in your sleep.”

 

“It will take another few days for you to be completely better, and we’ll need to keep an eye on your wound, make sure it doesn’t get infected.”

 

“I liked the way it sounded.” Nora reached out and caught Kenz’s hand in a loose grip, one she could pull away from. “Hell of a thing to wake up to.”

 

“What happened to you?” Kenz leaned against the bed, angling in so she could whisper the question.

 

“Nothing important. Accidentally stabbed myself. Don’t try to shave with a knife when drunk.” Nora’s lips tilted up, her weight resting on one hand, her other around Kenz’s wrist, her body turned toward the other woman. She was temptation in the flesh. Everything Kenz wanted, right there.

 

“That’s the lie you’re going to come up with? The bruises, the cuts on your knuckles, the bloody weapons I took off you?”

 

“Did I worry you?”

 

“This place isn’t a joke, Nora. I don’t want to have to watch you die the next time you ‘cut yourself shaving.’”

 

Nora opened her mouth, probably for another snarky lie, but Kenz silenced her with a kiss this time. She didn’t kiss her like she had in her dream, or like they had in the clinic that first time. Kenz was rough, probably too rough for Nora given she was injured, but it didn’t matter.

 

There had been so much blood, and all that worry, all that anger, she fueled it into the aggressive kiss. Finally, she’d had something, some connection to another person, slight as it might have been, and that person went and got themselves stabbed?

 

Nora returned the kiss, hand flexing around Kenz’s wrist like she wanted to drag her closer but knew better.

 

A noise outside the door to the market had Kenz yanking away a moment before the door opened.

 

Stupid. She knew better. Colter wouldn’t hesitate to kill anyone who touched her.

 

“I hear my newest pup got herself into some trouble.” Mason strolled into the market, the Alpha rolling his shoulders as spoke. He scolded Nora the way a parent might scold a kid who’d done something hilarious but technically wrong. “What happened, Nora?”

 

“Cut myself shaving.”

 

He laughed as he pushed past Kenz and leaned his hip on the bed. He pulled Nora’s shirt up to see the wound, and to her credit, Nora didn’t pull away and flinch. “Look at that, huh? What exactly were you shaving?”

 

Nora said nothing back, eyes narrowed.

 

Mason pulled her shirt back into place. “See, I got Nisha on my ass claiming she lost six girls. Six. Now, that’s a hell of a thing, the sort of shit I expect from myself, maybe one or two of my Pack close to the top, but not outta some new little spit like you. You been holding out on me, kitten?”

 

Nora pressed her lips together, eyes careful, face blank. “They jumped me. I didn’t have a choice.”

 

Mason slapped a hand down on Nora’s shoulder. “So it was you? You ain’t gotta explain shit to me, I ain’t ever pissed about dead Disciples. They can’t hold their own, we chew on ‘em. That’s how life works, and you did it up right. Slaughtered ‘em and didn’t leave a fucking witness, not a single person who knew it was you, knew it was us. So, since you pleased me, I’ll make sure no one knows it was you.” He turned to face Kenz. “How long till she’s outta here?”

 

“She can leave today, but she won’t be back to full strength for another few days.”

 

“Fair enough. She’s ready to go, you send word to me. I’ll send a few boys over to help her back to Pack territory, and she’ll bunk close to me till she’s back on her feet.” Mason advanced on Kenz, who managed not to retreat from the imposing figure. “She was never here.” He curled his fingers into her collar. “I find out you opened your mouth, no one will ever find your bones.”

 

Kenz opened her mouth to respond, but Nora’s voice did it instead.

 

“Take your hands off her.”

 

Mason didn’t, but he did twist his neck so he could look at Nora. “You want to rethink your tone when talking to your Alpha?”

 

Nora swung her feet off the gurney and got to her feet. “Nope. I took out six Disciples, so you know damned well what I can and will do. I’m yours, Alpha, but you touch her? I’ll show you my bite personally.”

 

Mason’s eyebrow lifted before his lips split into a wide grin. He pulled his hand from Kenz’s collar. “Every animal has the thing it’ll bite for, and I guess we found yours, didn’t we? You want some advice from someone who has been here a while?” He caught Kenz’s chin despite the way his eyes stayed on Nora. “Be careful with this one. Colter likes her and he finds out about whatever this it? You’re just asking for trouble, kitten, and it might just be trouble you can’t handle. Now, sit your ass down and rest up. I want you ready to kill off some more Disciples soon.” Mason released Kenz and walked out.

 

Nora all but collapsed on the gurney when the door shut behind him, and Kenz was there in a heartbeat, helping her settle back onto the bed. “That wasn’t smart. You shouldn’t stand up to Mason, he’s ruthless.”

 

“What he is is a raider boss surrounded by opposing gangs. He needs every good fighter he has, and that makes me too useful to kill. Besides, I didn’t like his hands on you.”

 

“He wouldn’t hurt me.”

 

“Because of Colter?”

 

Kenz grabbed the blanket that had fallen to the floor and draped it over her.

 

Nora caught her wrist again like she had earlier. “If you’re taken, if you’re involved, I have a right to know. Are you with Colter?”

 

Kenz couldn’t force the words out. She refused to say she was involved because that made it real. It wasn’t real, it was a joke, but a joke she couldn’t escape. The punchline just kept repeating in her head like it might make her laugh one day. Still, she knew nothing could happen with Nora. Mason had told the truth. If Colter found out, if he even suspected, he’d slaughter Nora for it.

 

Hell, he might kill Kenz for it, too.

 

Nora’s life meant more than Kenz’s pride, so she dropped her eyes and nodded. “Yeah. I’m taken.”

 

Nora’s thumb rubbed a soft circle over her pulse before she squeezed once and laid back on the bed. “I understand.”

 

And the scary thing? The way she’d said it, that threat in her voice, Kenz was pretty sure she did understand.


	3. Chapter 3

Two weeks passed without seeing Nora. A pack raider would come and collect stimpacks and antibiotics, things she was sure were for Nora, but no one called for her, no one asked for her.

 

The loneliness got to Kenz, strange since she’d not felt lonely much in her time at Nuka World. Perhaps it was because she’d grown used to it?

 

Those few moments with Nora had shown her something else, shown her something different.

 

It meant that, after two weeks, after waiting, after knowing Nora had recovered but yet to come back, Kenz decided enough was enough.

 

After the sun fell, she snuck into the Pack territory. It didn’t require much sneaking, the Pack had more slaves than any other group. Kenz took care of everyone, so she had more freedom to be wherever she wanted without people bothering her.

 

She asked another slave where Nora slept, and they pointed her toward a small room near the back of the Backstage area, beside Mason’s room.

 

Kenz waited until no one was around before she slid into the room and closed the door behind her.

 

Nora’s body on the bed was lit by the glow of a single lamp in the corner. She lifted her gaze to Kenz from the book she’d been reading. “Are you okay?”

 

“You never came back.”

 

“No, I didn’t.”

 

Kenz’s confidence fled at that. Maybe she’d been wrong about this all? Maybe she’d misread everything? Her hand moved behind her, grasping for the door handle, wanting to leave before she was kicked out.

 

“Wait,” Nora said as she set the book down. “You can come over here if you want. You came all this way, we might as well talk.”

 

Kenz pulled her hand from the door and crossed the distance. She kicked off her shoes and got onto the bed beside Nora, sitting beside her, their backs against the headboard.

 

“Why didn’t you come back? Or ask for me to check your wound?”

 

“I asked around about you. I didn’t think I needed to before, but after what Mason said? I had to understand a little better.”

 

“Oh.” Kenz picked at a fraying thread of her bottom hem of her shirt.

 

Of course, that was it. No one wanted to risk their life. Kenz couldn’t even blame her for it, not really. The moment she realized what Kenz was to Colter, what he might do if someone else tried to take her, well, it was an easy choice to make.

 

Still, it stung.

 

“I understand. I wouldn’t want you to risk that,” Kenz said, voice soft.

 

“What?” Nora twisted to face Kenz. “You think I haven’t been there because I’m worried about my own skin? No, that’s not it at all. Colter can’t do fuck all to me, but you’re in enough danger. I still have some hope that, maybe, in the future, something can be different. Overbosses don’t stick around forever, and he’ll get his, and when he does? Who the hell knows what you’ll want, but you’ll have choices at least. For now though? I can’t risk you, can’t make your life any more difficult than it is, and that’s exactly what I’d do for you. So, I stayed out of your way even when what I really wanted was to come see you.”

 

“You wanted to see me?”

 

Nora smiled. “Yeah. I mean, after a kiss like that, how could I not want to come see you?”

 

Kenz stared at her and gave in. She couldn’t not give in, not want her.

 

Tomorrow, she’d have to see Colter. She’d have to go back to her old life, her old place, to her old heartaches. For right then, though, she wanted to pretend.

 

Kenz shifted over, straddling Nora’s waist. She slid her fingers into Nora’s hair and pulled her forward as she kissed her.

 

Nora’s hands went to the tops of Kenz’s thighs, her hands tight, thumbs pressed into the inside of her thigh muscles. “This okay?” Nora panted the words out during the brief moments when their lips broke apart.

 

“Yes. Just keep touching me, please?”

 

“Like that’s something I could refuse.” Nora’s smart-ass words broke off when Kenz moved her lips to Nora’s neck. The words dissolved into a deep moan, one that had haunted Kenz’s dreams.

 

Nora’s hands tightened on her thighs, her hips lifting with a soft roll. “Fuck, I’ve been thinking about your lips. Ever since that first day, I’ve been thinking about your lips.”

 

Kenz pepper bites over Nora’s pulse, down to her shoulder where only the thin strap obstructed her access. She bowed her back as she dipped her tongue into the space between Nora’s collarbones.

 

Nora moved her hands up her thighs, then over her hips, grasping once before tracing her rib cage. She didn’t grope, didn’t go for Kenz’s breasts, the touch careful.

 

A shuddered breath and a moan filled with lust were Nora’s response when Kenz drug her fingers over the outer curve of Nora’s breast.

 

“Wait,” Nora said on a broken gasp. “Wait. Slow down.”

 

Kenz sat back, her hand cupping Nora’s ribcage, her thumb still brushing against the side of her breast. “I don’t want to slow down. I’m okay, really.”

 

Nora’s tongue wet her lip as she returned her hands to Kenz’s hips. “Yeah, you seem a little more than okay, but you don’t know me, not really. Let’s-“ she drew a shaky breath, “-let’s just slow this down. I don’t want you doing something you regret.”

 

“I know everything I need to know about you.”

 

“You don’t know a thing about me, actually, and I don’t want you finding out and then wishing you’d never let me do anything to you, and trust me, I want to do a lot to you.”

 

Kenz should let the conversation drop, but she couldn’t, not when Nora’s voice held such promise. “Like what?”

 

Nora’s thumbs slid beneath the hem of Kenz’s shirt to touch her skin directly. “Oh, Kenz, everything. I want to strip you down out of these clothes and spread you out on this bed. I want to crawl between these legs of yours and taste you until you’re moaning my name again. I want to take those very agile fingers of yours and ride them. I bet you can do magic with those fingers, huh?”

 

Kenz released a whimper at the images that flashed through her head as she considered each thing Nora suggested. In that moment, she wanted each of those things, too.

 

She went to lean in, to kiss Nora again, but instead, Nora used her grasp on Kenz’s hips to roll her off her and settle her into the bed beside her. “But those things will have to wait. I won’t take advantage of you, so none of that can happen, not until you really know who I am, until you decide you want me.”

 

Kenz wanted to tell her she did want her. Right then? In that moment? That’s exactly what she wanted.

 

Nora brushed her lips against Kenz’s and scooted down, pulling her until she laid on the bed beside her. “I’m not kidding. Nothing else happens, not until everything is out in the open.”

 

“Can I stay the night, at least?”

 

Nora shifted closer, then wrapped an arm around Kenz. “Yeah. That sounds good.”

 

#

 

Kenz didn’t spend every night in Nora’s bed. It would be too suspicious, too likely to cause problems. As it was, no one seemed to notice other than Mason.

 

The Alpha had started to grin at Kenz, a taunting smirk that made her skin crawl and put her on high alert. Still, he said nothing, and since Colter hadn’t said a word, she had to assume Mason hadn’t said anything to the Overboss.

 

Those nights she did sneak away mattered, though. Brief moments of happiness in an otherwise dark world. She’d curl around Nora, bury her face in the woman’s neck, and just breathe her in. They rarely talked, mostly because Kenz didn’t show up until the middle of the night.

 

Nora wasn’t even awake most times. When Kenz would slide into her room and strip down, Nora would open an eye and smile. She’d pull the blanket down and scoot over to make room.

 

Kenz would crawl into the bed and plaster herself to Nora’s back, her arm around Nora’s waist before they drifted back off to sleep together.

 

Mornings can early, and Kenz would leave before the sun rose to avoid being seen. She’d press a kiss to Nora’s shoulder before pulling away, rewarded with a disgruntled huff from the sleeping woman.

 

This was something special, something she desperately wanted but had no idea how to get.

 

It was a taste, and Kenz wanted the full meal. She wanted a life where she could wake up beside Nora because it was time to get up, a life where she could throw her arms around Nora and they could kiss no matter who was around.

 

She wanted a life where she wasn’t always worried about Colter finding out, where she didn’t have to share so much of herself with a man she didn’t want.

 

The man stood by the bar in his loft, a beer in his hand. “They’re plotting something.”

 

Kenz knew he didn’t expect an answer, but she offered one anyway. “Who?”

 

“I don’t know. Pack, if I had to guess, but honestly? They’re all acting strange. It’s like someone is screwing with me from each of the gangs. Things keep going wrong, fights between the raiders, and I’ve had more challenges lately.”

 

Kenz imagined a world where someone managed to kill Colter. Who would take over, then? Would the entire park just fall apart? They’d followed Colter and Gage on a promise. Could any other raider make as good a promise?

 

At least the odds were another raider wouldn’t want her. Kenz wasn’t stupid. She wasn’t beautiful, not special or strong. Colter’s strange obsession came about because she’d saved him, and he’d latched onto her at that time.

 

She’d never make that mistake again. If she ran into another dying Overboss, she’d let them bleed out.

 

“What’re you smiling at?”

 

“Thinking about someone killing you.” The words slid out before she could think about them, before she remembered why they were such a bad idea.

 

Of course, the way his face went hard, that told her.

 

Still, some part of her tired of everything she couldn’t have wasn’t sorry, not a bit. Let him do his worst.

 

#

 

The bed groaned beneath Kenz as she crawled in beside Nora, moving slowly. She’d already stripped off her clothing, left it piled by the door.

 

“Two nights in a row? Lucky me,” Nora teased before she rolled over toward Kenz.

 

Kenz said nothing back and flinched when Nora’s fingers brushed her face, sliding over the place where her lip had split.

 

Nora froze, then rolled away to pull the string on the lamp beside the bed. Light flooded the room along with an angry tension.

 

“What happened?”

 

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

“And I don’t want to see you all bruised up like this, but it seems no one is getting what they want tonight.” Nora’s thumb stroked below Kenz’s eye, where she knew it was already darkening. “Oh, sweetheart. Who did this to you?”

 

“It doesn’t matter.”

 

They always seemed to have their conversations with neither actually answering the questions posed.

 

“It matters greatly to me. It was Colter, wasn’t it? That fucking piece of shit.”

 

Kenz smiled at the insult even when a spark of pain and dribble of warmth said she’d reopened the cut on her lip. “He asked me why I was smiling, and I said I was thinking about someone killing him.”

 

Nora huffed out a soft laugh. “Not the smartest thing you’ve ever said.”

 

“Maybe not, but worth it. I’ve never said anything against him before, just played along. He was worried, said someone is trying to usurp him, trying to make a play for his position. It made me think about what life would be like if he was gone.”

 

“I figured whatever is between you isn’t what you want. It’s not a case of you just looking for special treatment, is it?”

 

Kenz shook her head, her gaze down. “I started as a doctor here because Colter and his raiders attacked my settlement. I got them to agree to a ceasefire for me to tend to the wounded, including Colter. After that, he told me if I came to Nuka World, if I agreed to be their doctor, he’d leave my settlement alone.”

 

“And the rest?”

 

“Colter isn’t a man you say no to, isn’t a man you speak against, and I never did. At least, not until this. He says jump, you say how high. He says take your clothes off, you take them off.”

 

Nora’s fingers pressed against Kenz’s chin until she lifted her face. “He’s never going to touch you again, Kenz. I promise that.”

 

And right then? Kenz wanted to believe it. She wanted to believe Nora because Nora sure as hell believed it.

 

But Kenz had lived too long to believe in fairytales or heroes. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

 

Nora pressed a kiss to Kenz’s forehead. “If you only knew, sweetheart, the things I’ve done that people said couldn’t be done. This isn’t idle talk, not from me.”

 

Kenz moved closer and pressed her leg between Nora’s. She didn’t try to rub her thigh against her, just wanted that closeness, wanted the feeling of as much of Nora against her as she could get. “I don’t need promises, Nora. I just need this.”

 

Nora ran her fingers through Kenz’s hair before pulling her against her. “Well, lucky for you, I can do that, too.”

 

Kenz woke alone in Nora’s bed, having not even realized when she’d fallen asleep. She knew from the way her body woke, slow and rested, that she’d long overslept.

 

It had to be mid-day, at least.

 

How could Nora have let her sleep? How could she have snuck out?

 

Kenz stumbled out of the bed and to her feet. She pulled on her clothing, ignoring the way she ached, the way the bruises Colter had left made her slow.

 

She left the room in a rush, trying to get to the market before anyone noticed she was gone.

 

Except upon leaving the room, she ran right into Mason’s chest.

 

He caught her arm. “Easy there, Doc.”

 

Kenz froze, her mind working. “Nora wasn’t feeling well. I had to check on her.”

 

Mason flashed a mocking grin. “Yeah? I bet you made her feel all better, didn’t you?”

 

“It’s not like-“

 

“Don’t care, really. Who is fucking who don’t interest me, not unless I’m involved. Course, you two ever want to try that? Hell, I’m game. Otherwise, Overboss demanded to see you when you woke up.”

 

Her mouth went dry at that. He knew? Colter knew?

 

If he knew about her and Nora, if he’d somehow found out, he’d kill her. He’d kill Nora.

 

She needed to warn Nora, to tell her to run. Kenz pulled at Mason’s grip. “I have to go.”

 

“Not happening, Doc. You were ordered up to the loft, and I ain’t about to go pissing off the Overboss. I happen to like my nuts exactly where they are. Come on, let’s get going.”

 

It didn’t matter how much Kenz pulled, Mason didn’t let up his grip as he hauled her though Nuka World, then tossed her onto the lift and hit the button.

 

Kenz gripped the railing and forced her legs to hold her.

 

It was time to face Colter.


	4. Chapter 4

 Kenz held tight to the lift as it rattled to the top. It wasn’t fair, none of it.

 

She finally found someone she wanted, someone she could spend the rest of her life with, and it was all being stolen from her again.

 

It had happened with Samantha when she’d watched her bleed out in front of her. It was going to happen again, now.

 

Colter would slit her throat, if she was lucky, as a warning to anyone else who thought about betraying him.

 

Her legs gave out. She placed her hands over her face.

 

Let Colter do whatever he wanted. Hell, maybe Nora had already run. Maybe she was miles away.

 

Nothing would make Kenz happier than knowing Nora was safe, knowing she was outside of Colter’s reach.

 

The lift jostled her as it stopped at the top of the lift, then groaned as someone stepped on it.

 

Kenz didn’t lift her head. “Fuck you, Colter. Do whatever you want to me, I’m done. I finally found someone worth a damn, and it sure as hell was never you, so you know what? Fuck you.”

 

“I promised you he’d never touch her again.”

 

Kenz snapped her eyes open to find Nora crouching in front of her, bruised but breathing, a smile on her lips.

 

She was on her feet, and then on Nora, a heartbeat later. She knocked Nora down as she wrapped her arms around her, lips seeking Nora’s.

 

She didn’t care right then how Nora was there, where Colter was, nothing else mattered.

 

Nora let Kenz have the kiss, didn’t complain when Kenz knew her nails dug into Nora’s shoulders, might have even drawn blood.

 

Eventually, Kenz pulled back, lifting herself up with her hands to stare down at Nora. “How are you here?”

 

“You’re currently molesting the Overboss of Nuka World,” came a man’s voice. Not just any man, but the Operator with the sunglasses who had drug Nora in after she’d been stabbed.

 

“What? Where’s Colter?”

 

Nora pressed her palms against the ground to sit up. “Colter is very dead. I faced him in the Arena this morning and killed him. Gage, too.”

 

“How could you have killed him?”

 

The man in the glasses crouched down. “You haven’t been properly introduced, have you? This is Nora Jacobs, the woman who blew up the Institute and destroyed the Brotherhood. One little raider Overboss is hardly a workout for her.”

 

Kenz looked back at Nora. “You destroyed the Institute? That was you?”

 

“Told you I keep my promises.” Nora leaned in for another kiss like she couldn’t help it, like she needed the touch as much as Kenz.

 

“And because I don’t need to see my best friend having sex on the floor, I’m out of here. I’ll be downstairs, Nora.”

 

Nora didn’t even turn to answer him. “Thanks, Deacon. I’ll see you in the morning.”

 

“Yeah, sure. I’ll wait until you come on down, though, for the same reason I just mentioned.” He waved once before taking the lift down, leaving Nora and Kenz alone.

 

“Now, you want to get off me? If not, I won’t complain, of course.”

 

Kenz’s cheeks flushed before she scrambled off Nora.

 

Nora hopped to her feet, brushing her hands off on her thighs. She stuck a hand out to help Kenz up.

 

“Come on, sweetheart, let’s sit down and talk about the things you don’t know.”

 

#

 

Night had fallen by the time they finished talking, by the time Nora had finished telling her everything.

 

It made more sense how Nora had managed to kill those Disciples, how she’d killed Colter. As it turned out, Nora was the hero who had dealt with all the Institute, with all the threats.

 

Kenz drug her fingers through her hair, tried to smooth it down. She was a slave doctor from some backward settlement and Nora was this flawless hero. She’d never felt so out of her league before. Nora had removed her slave collar, the skin beneath raw and sensitive.

 

A hand on her thigh had Kenz frowning, looking down to find Nora’s hand there. “I’m glad you’re here,” Nora said.

 

“Why? It sounds like there’s no shortage of people who are interested in you. Why do you care about me?”

 

“When I took down the Institute, no one else was willing to stand up, to do anything, not at first. You? You stood up against Colter, you sacrificed yourself and your freedom for other people. You’ve spent your life saving people. How could I not want that?”

 

“That’s not what you said before about what you wanted from me.”

 

Nora traced her fingers along Kenz’s thigh. “That’s true. There are other less innocent things I’ve thought about. I just didn’t want to scare you off by saying them, especially since I’m not sure you’re ready for them.”

 

Kenz let her fingers grasp the buttons of Nora’s shirt and began to pop them free one at a time. “Please?”

 

“You sound pretty when you beg, you know that? It’s something I’d love to hear more of, but I just don’t think I could deny you enough for that. We’ll go slow and see how it goes, okay?”

 

Kenz grasped the hem of her own shirt and pulled it off, then leaned forward, her chest pressing against Nora’s as she stole another kiss.

 

Her hand drifted up Nora’s side, and because of her bare skin, she could feel each scar ridge, each tiny imperfection. She cupped Nora’s breast then slid her thumb over her nipple which had started to pebble.

 

Nora’s moan encouraged her, had her bring her other hand up to do the same to the other breast.

 

The idea of a woman like that coming apart from her touch made Kenz feel more powerful than she ever had before. She leaned down, trailing kisses over Nora’s throat, her collarbone, then over her left breast. She danced her tongue over the skin before she captured Nora’s nipple between her lips.

 

“Fuck,” Nora whispered, her hands held away. “Can I touch you?”

 

Kenz sucked on the nipple, then pulled once before releasing it. “Yeah, just. . . “

 

“I’ll go slow. I promise, and you know now, I keep my promises.” Nora moved her hands over Kenz’s back, her nails scratching softly against the skin there. She undid the button of Kenz’s pants before she dipped her fingers in, then waited.

 

Kenz pulled back then rose to her knees. She worked her pants and underwear down her hips herself, then got them off entirely. Before she moved back into Nora’s lap, she removed Nora’s pants as well.

 

Nora didn’t help beyond a lift of her hips when Kenz worked the fabric off. She left the underwear in place, the tempting line between Nora’s skin and the white of the underwear too good to get rid of.

 

When Kenz got the pants over her ankles, crouched in front of the couch as she was, it placed her between Nora’s thighs.

 

The tilt of Nora’s lips said she’d noticed.

 

Kenz moved both hands up the insides of Nora’s legs, pressing her palms against her thighs to spread her legs. Kenz hands went to Nora’s hips, her thumbs pressed to the edges of Nora’s underwear. She traced those edges up, then ran both thumbs down the center of Nora’s cunt, pressing the fabric in.

 

Nora moaned, but Kenz didn’t hear it. She focused only on the space between Nora’s legs where her thumbs played, a dark spot appearing as the fabric soaked up Nora’s wetness.

 

She moved one thumb to the top of Nora’s slit and pressed against her clit, rubbing there in tight circles. Her thumb slid off a few times when Nora couldn’t hold still, shifting her hips forward for more.

 

So Kenz slipped a finger of her other hand inside the crotch of the underwear and into Nora’s cunt. She crooked the finger as she thrust it into her, then moved the underwear away enough to rub directly on Nora’s clit.

 

The reaction was beautiful. Nora’s hips arched up, desperate and quick. Kenz gave her what she wanted, adding a second finger and then blowing cool air over her clit.

 

Nora reached out, a hand sliding into Kenz’s hair. She didn’t yank her forward, didn’t even guide her forward. No, she only stroked her fingers through her hair like she just needed to touch Kenz, to keep herself grounded.

 

Kenz still leaned in to drag her tongue against Nora’s clit, her gaze locked on Nora’s.

 

Must have been enough, because Nora shuddered, her cunt squeezing down on Kenz’s fingers as she came

 

Another cool blow of air over Nora’s clit had her shivering as she came down.

 

Kenz moved up and crawled into Nora’s lap, a kiss as she panted, as her body recovered.

 

After a moment of the one-sided kiss, Nora set her hands on Kenz’s bare hips, then slid one forward, thumb on Kenz’s mound. She spoke against her lips. “Can I?”

 

Kenz nodded, spreading her thighs more around Nora’s hips.

 

Nora didn’t wait for another offer. She brought her fingers to her mouth first, sucking two of them past her lips before she moved to Kenz’s clit.

 

The touch made her jerk forward.

 

Colter never touched her like that. He’d expected her to be ready for sex when he was ready. He never tried to please her, to make her enjoy it. Maybe she should be thankful for it, but at least it hadn’t tainted this.

 

“You’re so wet,” Nora whispered. “Fuck, you’re so wet.”

 

Nora’s fingers slid back, away from her clit.

 

Kenz pushed the flat of her palms against Nora’s shoulders. “Not inside me. Don’t put your fingers inside me.”

 

Nora hushed her, their cheeks sliding against each other before Nora buried her face in Kenz’s neck. “I won’t, sweetheart. Relax for me again?” She returned to her clit.

 

And, for the first time, Kenz believed her. She believed Nora, that she’d never hurt her, that she’d never do anything more than Kenz wanted. So she rocked her hips, forward and back, her arms sliding around Nora’s shoulders.

 

That warmth in her stomach, that tension, it grew, tightened. Nora stoked it with the touch of her fingers, with the press of her lips against her neck, and when Kenz came, when she cried out softly, Nora swallowed the sounds with a kiss.

 

#

 

The sun came up, waking Kenz along with the press of Nora’s lips against the back of her neck. “Morning,” Nora whispered.

 

“Morning,” Kenz offered but didn’t roll over, wasn’t willing to face Nora or real life just yet.

 

“What are you thinking so hard about? Because I know you haven’t woken up beside me yet, but I refuse to think that much until I’ve had at least one cup of coffee.”

 

“Now that you’re Overboss and we’ve had sex, are you going to be done with me?”

 

Silence met her at first, dragging out as her anxiety climbed. Finally, the bed moved as Nora sat up and rolled Kenz to her back, shifting over her. “You think this was all I wanted?”

 

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

 

“Well, I can tell you that I want more, a lot more, and we’re finally in a place where that’s possible. I want to take you out of here, show you the Commonwealth, meet that family you have on that settlement, introduce you to my friends. No, Kenz, I’m not anywhere close to done with you.” Nora paused, her smile slipping away for a frown. “If that’s what you want, of course. This all? This wasn’t something I did you need to pay me off for. If you don’t want this, if you’re not ready for this, that’s okay, too. I’ll take you back to your settlement and never bother you again. So, I guess the real question is, what do you want?”

 

Kenz looked at Nora, and it was the nerves that undid her. Nora was nervous. The woman who had done so many things Kenz had heard about, the woman who had killed Colter, and yet there she was, nervous. She was ready to give up something she clearly wanted, something she could take, leaving it up to Kenz.

 

And that answered it for Kenz. What did she want?

 

“I want more of this,” Kenz answered, her hand going to the back of Nora’s neck to pull her down for another kiss.

 

For the first time in her life, the answer was so easy.


End file.
